I’m too fucking tired to get up fuck

Well I managed to completely fuck up the rest of my day

I’m fine I just

Fucking fuck why

The increasingly common answer is social anxiety.

Wheee self-doubt and sadness kicking in again

Seriously what is social interaction even

I am just a complete train wreck today wow

wow okay breathing is getting a little difficult this shouldn’t be so scary I’m just WRITING it like I’m not even sending it yet

i’m also starting to self-sabotage in my head so there we are

ok i need to compose this email now

Can this be true? I don’t believe what I see. 

oh my god I can listen to Kerli’s little spiel in her Supergirl Cambio performance again about girl empowerment and it is so so wonderful

*tries very hard not to hyperventilate about this email*

on the one hand, this is probably really fucking creepy and not really good but on the other hand I’m doing my best not to infringe on privacy and comfort and other other hand I really want to talk to him again and


also wifi and Internet is extremely spotty where I live so… Expect less of me for the next few months? D:

Oh holla I’ve revisited some music and I think I’ve got another for courf.

wow okay i didn’t expect my design class reading to be so difficult, but???

man i’m really bad at visualising stuff out of textual description like this.

I haven’t listened to Break of Reality in so long what a MISTAKE gosh they’re fantastic

If you don’t know about them, they’re a cello rock group local to my city back home that’s been through a bunch of lineup changes but they’re a good time and fucking awesome live.

IDK they played at my middle school when I was like 13? and it was pretty amazing.

Here’s their website and here’s their bandcamp where you can listen to some of their stuff.

Oops cue some good old-fashioned self-disgust.

I just had a conversation with two people whom I feel are infinitely better people than I am, and even though that’s a stupid way of thinking and part of what got me into trouble before in relationships with others, it still happens and I’m like. Fuck.